It's 4:30 A.M.

Ugh! Do I have to wake up at this ungodly hour and even more so get out of bed?  What time is it? But it's only 4:30 AM!  Alright, yes I will go running. 

That is what I feel like most mornings when I have to get up to go run.  This morning in particular, even after a good eight hour sleep.  I will.  I won't.  I will.  I won't.  Oh, all right I will.  Even if I want to say I won't and just crawl back into bed for another hour or two of sleep.

I wonder if I'll ever get the hang of this? By nature, I love to sleep.  But that hasn't been something I have been doing a lot of lately, with the exception of my Sunday naps which I love.  I actually am normally up by 5:30 AM because the kids have to be up and ready for school and even if I don't have to wake them up my body clock just sets off and I'm usually awake at that time.  It didn't of course used to be that way, which goes to show that the body CAN be trained. 

So does that mean it will get easier for me to get up an hour earlier for my runs?  Will I stop struggling and just get up one day and say "yay! let's go, I can't wait to run."  I would like to think so. 

In the meantime, I'm glad to be pushed.  Because after each and every run I commit myself to, whether it be a good run or a bad one - I am thankful I still ran and that leaves me feeling amazing...I logged in more kilometers...I did something to improve myself...

...I whisper to myself...small steps...

it will get better.